i'm in indianapolis and just waiting for my flight. sang two concerts here and had a blast. early music rocks! the musicians are like jazz musicians and historians mixed together. so quirky and interesting and BRILLIANT. my lord, i know nothing compared to these people! okay, i know nothing period. but i like it that way!

anyway, i did have to work with this very typical, toxic singer. blech. and the first day of the gig, i called my mom crying and telling her that i think i need to quit singing. i was so upset and so depressed. by the next day, there was a different mezzo on the gig and she was SO inspiring and amazing. and a fantastic teacher! i picked her brain about studio stuff. i feel like the devil was really working on me and i won the fight. by the end of the gig, i had 3 more gigs lined up and a sense of joy about singing again.

the bottom line is: people shouldn't affect me that much. but they do. no matter how i might try to change and be a stronger person, i just struggle with toxicity. i struggle with imbalance. i can't deal with hostile vibrations, man!!!