i am on an interesting journey that is really teaching me a lot about being a real human being.
my friend toni put me on a "no" diet. or would it be a "yes" diet? 40 days of saying no to things that make me crazy. at first, it was career-focused. no to gigs that don't pay very well. no to gigs that hurt my voice. no to the stress of performances.
it quickly turned into SO MUCH MORE. i started taking my life back. i can't believe what a pushover i've been all these years. this has led me to reconfiguring my voice studio, working out so much more, and being able to say yes to the people who deserve that word.
little "no's" that you wouldn't think would matter:
NO to being overly nice to people who are never nice.
NO to trying on 10 outfits before i step out of the door. in conjunction with that, NO to looking in a full-length mirror. i feel great about myself until i check it out. so why am i checking it out?
NO to being inconvenienced by ill-prepared students. i worked hard in undergrad. i don't need to work hard for you.
NO to my students not being able to read music.
NO to "friends" who drain me.
NO to dread.
NO to the 2nd glass of wine. i can't afford it, and my big butt doesn't need it.
NO to teaching 20 million students.
NO to acting peppy perky, when i really feel anything but. i can't believe how much more energy i have!
NO to facebook. wonderful.
NO to TV (said that a long time ago and it is true bliss).
NO to anything that gets in the way of being my best self for the following wonderful people: sam, my family, my amazing friends, my long-distance friends, and especially my friends in need.
NO to leaving my couch right now? well, i guess i do have to say yes to work.
2 comments:
I have got to learn how to use this word!! I keep saying yes to a schedule that makes me miserable some days. Case in point: I played Strauss violin sonata (basically a romantic piano concerto--HARD!!!) in Ojai on Sunday afternoon and I actually agreed to drive to LA for rehearsal after the recital. That's right I didn't even get to bask in the glory of playing a monster piece; instead, I moved on the next rehearsal for which I was unprepared.
that is totally how i live my life. NO MORE.
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