the lazy blogger

I really want to start blogging once a week.  It's therapy.  I've always wanted to write a book and this could be the sounding board to test it out.  Does anyone read this blog, except for my mother?  (thanks, mom...)

I receive a devotional every morning on e-mail from Renaissance Unity.  It's usually a thought, like the one below, a meditation that's short and easy to remember throughout the day, and a prayer.  Here's today's thought:

"When we begin to reach out to connect with God, our Creator responds immediately providing for us a glow of hope and inspiration we had not previously known. As this happens, we experience a new birth that Jesus spoke of.

However, with an awakening in our soul, may also come a shaking up in our life that can be unsettling. This comes about as the Holy Spirit says, in essence, “You’re living too small. I’m coming in to change you.”

As we remain steadfast in our faith, we will discover that the Universe is conspiring on our behalf and truly leading us to our Greater Good."
~Ron Scott

I like this one this morning because it reminds me of the Prayer of Jabez.  When you pray the prayer, don't forget to fasten your seatbelt!  Letting God take hold of the reigns COMPLETELY is very powerful and you might end up in places way outside your comfort level. I would say I'm a pretty fearless person, given my past behavior.  But I am definitely living outside my comfort zone these days.  Not being married and getting ready to turn 35?  not comfortable.  It's scary.  It's like living on a trapeze with no net.  Some of my thoughts consist of:  "Now, let me see here, uh, how exactly am I going to meet a single, great guy at this age?"  and, "Helloooo, hello, hello, is there anybody out there!"  (to quote Pink Floyd)

I'll admit ~ I've panicked more than once.  But I'm getting over that hump.  God has me here for a reason and I don't want to miss out on the blessings because I'm too busy freaking out!

I like the part where Ron Scott capitalizes the words Greater Good.  I envision it being the title of a very large book God owns, with gold edges on the pages.  He opens it up and starts to read it to us and we throw our hands over our ears and go, "LA LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU."  God's like, "Alrighty then, I guess I'll just shut this and try again later.  What, Sarah darling, would you like for me to read you in the meantime?  The book about the boy that is great for 3 minutes and then turns into a dirtbag but you keep believing in him because you have such a big heart?  Yes, that's your favorite one.  We've read that one a lot, haven't we?  You should know it by heart now.  Well, whatever you want.  You're in charge, aren't you?"

oops.

Today, I'm going to tell God all day long that I am ready to hear from the book of blessings.   My heart is tightening in my chest already, because I'm scared.  

Why are blessings scary?